


Consequences

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Apologies, Canon Compliant, M/M, Manga Spoilers, Minor Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-19 22:37:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10649493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: After the ceremony, Levi decides to finally apologize to Eren for punching him back in Shiganshina.





	Consequences

**Author's Note:**

> Time skips, tbh, are the bane of my existence (unless, of course, i'm the one doing them, lol), and I, along with many others, was pretty upset with the lack of an actual apology from Levi. So Amy([perfectfearsomebeauty](http://perfectfearsomebeauty.tumblr.com)) and I decided to write this lovely oneshot. :>

By the time the ceremony had ended, leaving the remaining soldiers to converse with one another, the mood had greatly improved. Levi is almost certain that Flocke’s earlier choice of words, ones that had brought up bad memories without a doubt, had played a part in it being lowered; though he isn’t certain by how much, what with the findings of the past few days weighing heavy on their minds. What Levi does know for certain is the effect the words had on him, despite him trying to avoid the conflict for so long, and how they currently make him feel: guilty.

The remaining soldiers of the Corps wouldn’t know of this - not even Hanji -, of Levi’s sudden surge of guilt over what occurred in Shiganshina. Levi almost feels like a failure for not addressing the tension between himself and Eren sooner, even though he knows how much he struggles with approaching conflicts such as this. But after having listened in on the conversation between Flocke and the remainder of the Corps, Levi finally feels as if he has the right amount of motivation to approach Eren about the subject properly.

And now, he figures, is as good a time as any to finally speak to him, because Eren, unlike the rest of his comrades, seems to have abandoned the chatter section of the aftermath of the ceremony, choosing instead to stand alone. Levi doubts he’d be likely to catch him on his own again so easily after this night, so he decides to approach him. “Eren?”

Having excused himself from the company of his friends as soon as the ceremony came to an end, Eren now finds himself alone outside the Survey Corps’ headquarters in Trost district. He isn’t in the mood for chatter, not when he is trying to process all the information he had learned from his father’s books. He had barely started to come to terms with the fact that he’d eaten his own father.

Eren is so immersed in his thoughts that he doesn’t hear the steps approaching him, and the sound of his name in his captain’s voice startles him. “C-Captain!” He doesn’t take more than a second to gather himself together, however, clenching his jaw and crossing his arms in front of his chest as he turns to look at Levi.

With little to nothing in mind to say, Levi decides to go with what he knows and hope for the best. “Eren, are you angry with me?”

“Why would I be?” Eren asks once he has processed the question, avoiding a direct answer.

Having thought Eren was a little out of it earlier when he had left the HQ building, Levi doesn’t think he should be surprised to find Eren still deep in thought. However, the fact that he doesn’t notice Levi approaching him right away certainly throws Levi off. Clearly, something is weighing a lot heavier on his mind than Levi had thought so earlier. He briefly wonders if it could be the serum situation, especially with how uncomfortable Eren has been by his side, but it slips away from him soon enough. There had been a lot to think over these past few days, and the probability of it being the exact same as what Levi had worried over? It was unlikely.

The indirect response is far more upsetting to hear than Levi would have imagined it to be, especially with how vastly different it is in comparison to the understanding and denial he had been expecting. Levi has to remind himself, even now, that this is not the same soldier he’d met blinded by hero worship. With how they’ve grown to know each other, Levi can’t expect the same response as when he had kicked the shit out of Eren to save his life.

Still, Levi can’t help the frown he makes at the question in response. “Because of how I treated you before.” Levi furrows his brows and looks the other way, biting the inside of his cheek. “When we were in Shiganshina, and I had to choose between Erwin and Armin.”

Eren raises an eyebrow. He can’t say that he was expecting an answer to what had been mostly a rhetorical question. “You mean when you punched me,” he says without a hint of question, his voice stern. He finds his hands clenching into fists at his sides now, his anger resurfacing, and he can’t bring himself to care about their difference in rank right now.

Levi looks back over at Eren, hardly surprised by the hostile change - or really, what he had let fester until it could explode, like now. He can’t exactly blame Eren for being pissed at him, not back then and especially not right now. “Yeah,” Levi says, “when I punched you.”

Eren still hasn’t verbally answered his question, but his body posture and tone of voice are more than enough to let Levi know that he has fucked up. Enough so, that he doesn’t even bother to call out the fact that Eren is speaking to him, his captain, like no soldier ever should. “I know what I did back then was shitty, Eren. I never thought it wasn’t.”

Eren narrows his eyes as he listens. “Then why did you do it?” he asks, blurting the words out before he can stop himself.

Levi isn’t expecting that question at all, and it shows when he hesitates to answer. Because as much as he knows that what he did wasn’t justified, why he did it is still a hard subject for him. “I…” He bites his lip hard. “I couldn’t handle it,” he answers vaguely. “I know I shouldn’t have taken that out on you, but I really… I couldn’t let him die.”

Eren can only shake his head when he hears that answer, the movement slow in disbelief at first. “No,” he mutters under his breath, then shakes his head again, this time with more vehemence. “No. No, no, no, no, you don’t get to stand there and just say you ‘couldn’t handle it’,” he continues. “What happens next time you ‘can’t handle’ something, _Captain_?” His words are almost spat out, especially Levi’s title. “What happens? You’re just going to knock my teeth out again?” Eren pauses as he can’t hold back a humorless chuckle. “What does it matter, right? They’re just going to grow back. I’m just going to heal… from anything.” He takes a deep breath and takes a step forward. “Please, just stop pretending that you care…”

The words are venomous, but Levi can’t pretend that Eren isn’t making a good point, despite how painful it is to listen to. Perhaps he would have even stood there to just let Eren vent a little further, to get some of the thoughts off his chest, while he worked up some nerve to form some semblance of a proper apology - one he isn’t sure would even be enough - but those last words are too heartbreaking for Levi to just stand idly.

Had Levi really fucked up any remainder of the trust they’d been building these many months so bad that Eren couldn’t even tell if he cared anymore?

Just the thought of it makes Levi upset, almost sick of himself. “I’m a shitty liar, Eren, and we both know that,” he says. “And caring about you… that’s not something I could fake.” Levi almost takes a step closer towards Eren, but he stops while he’s still ahead, unable to help thinking it wouldn’t be a good idea. At least, not for now. Eren clearly wants little to do with him. “You must think I’m some kind of idiot,” he says, though really, he’s not sure if he could blame Eren for thinking that after all he’s done. “Of course I don’t think punching you will solve anything. You really think I’m so much of an asshole, that I think hurting you doesn’t matter because you heal? God, Eren.” The last two words are heavy and tired.

Eren is not sure what kind of answer he had been expecting. The heaviness and exhaustion behind those last two words almost cause him to falter for a brief moment, tempted to once again forgive Levi and leave that whole situation in the past. Almost.

He reaches up and rubs the back of his neck in frustration. “You know… I’m actually not sure anymore,” he says after a moment of hesitation. “I-I mean… I don’t think you believe that punching me will solve things, but the rest? I don’t know anymore.” Eren shakes his head once again, his voice rising an octave. “I don’t know. Honestly. You may not think that, Captain, but what about your actions?”

Eren pauses for a moment and lets out a deep, tired sigh, doing his best to ignore the tears forming in his eyes. “You know… I was actually okay with the act you had to put up back in that courtroom. I was okay with you kicking me to break my fight with Jean. I was okay, but what happened on that roof…” He trails off for a moment, unsure how to continue that sentence. “I’m going to ask this again. What happens next time you get upset, Captain? For all I know, you’ll just take it out on me. Again.”

Levi hesitates in answering the question, because for all he knows, he could take it out on Eren again. Not because he wants to, obviously, but because he isn’t quite sure how else to express himself at times. It’s a lousy excuse really, that he would use Eren as his personal punching-bag to try and retain some type of control, and the fact that he thinks about it like this only makes him less surprised the trust they’ve been building is falling apart.  
He can’t even blame Eren for thinking he doesn’t care, at this point.

“I don’t know,” Levi answers honestly, quietly. “It’s not like I can lie to you and say I don’t think a situation like before won’t come up and stress me out enough that I want to punch something.” Or someone, his mind helpfully supplies. “Even if I do think it’s unlikely, because the situation with Erwin was… complex for me.”

Trying to shake away those thoughts, Levi latches onto a new resolution. “I can promise to do better by you,” he offers. “Hell, you can punch me back. It’s not like I don’t deserve it.”

Eren’s eyebrows shoot up in response to those words, and he doesn’t say a word for a long moment. He just watches Levi instead, looking for any sign that his captain is trying to crack a joke -- surely Levi didn’t just offer to let Eren punch him, did he? For some reason he is not surprised when he finds no sign that it had been a joke. He remembers how Levi didn’t react negatively when Historia punched his arm in response to the time Levi had manhandled her. He also remembers how playful -- and soft -- that punch had been.

“I’m not Historia,” Eren mutters, more to himself than to Levi, as he wipes at his eyes angrily. He sends Levi a last glance before turning to leave, leading Levi to assume he’s resolved not to take the offer after all. That turns out to be a major mistake on Levi’s part. He isn’t prepared for when Eren stops after taking just a couple of steps, right hand clenched into a tight fist as he turns around and punches the older man as hard as he probably can in his human form.

Staggering backwards, Levi manages to remain standing by pure luck, leaning on the nearby wall of the HQ. He can’t help the muttered curses slipping from his lips as he clutches at his nose. He can feel blood drip from his nostrils and is able to tell right away he will probably have to set his nose back into place properly. That’s gonna hurt like a bitch.

“Fuck, kid, you’ve got a mean right hook,” he chuckles dryly, the sound coming out nasally.

Eren almost doesn’t hear the comment, the realization that he had just taken the offer and punched his superior office only starting to click as he clenches his other hand into a tight fist and this time sends it against Levi’s stomach. He grunts at the effort, the movement causing him to fall forward, almost unintentionally pressing Levi against the wall with his own body.

The force of the second punch, not to mention the unexpectancy of it, leads to Levi curling a bit forward. He clutches at his gut with an arm and lets out a few coughs, the ache in his stomach making him almost weak in the knees at first. He forces himself to straighten up more and is surprised by the sudden lack of distance between Eren and himself.

“What the hell, Eren?” he groans, not quite sure whether he’s referring to the lack of space or the second punch - maybe even both.

Eren doesn’t realize just how close they are until he opens his eyes again, hissing at the pain in his knuckles as he finally allows his hands to relax. He is still catching his breath when he pulls back to look at Levi, swallowing hard as he takes in the sight of Levi’s broken nose.

“I…” he starts, but can’t bring himself to utter an apology. Levi had offered him this, hadn’t he? “We’re even now,” he says instead, his brow furrowing in something akin to concern. “M-May I?” Eren asks, already reaching up to wipe the blood dripping from Levi’s nose on the sleeve of his shirt.

Levi isn’t expecting an apology, and though a better explanation would have been nice, he knows he gave Eren to opportunity to punch him even if he hadn’t been looking out for a second one. Although he’s still annoyed by the suddenness of it, he decides to let it go because he knows it doesn’t really compare to what Eren had been put through.  
The kind offer makes Levi raise his eyebrow, finding it strange for Eren to be so considerate even now. Perhaps the punches had really lessened some of his earlier frustration? Levi doubts it fixed everything, though; he would still need to earn back more of the trust they had previously been building.

The lack of distance makes it difficult to refuse the offer, but Levi still tries anyway. “No,” Levi says gently, pushing Eren’s arm away. “Wouldn’t want to ruin your shirt with my blood. It’s annoying as hell to clean.”

Eren releases a deep sigh and shakes his head firmly as he decides to just ignore Levi’s refusal and continue to try to wipe the captain’s face clean. “It’s just blood,” he all but whispers. “We haven’t cleaned these clothes in a while, anyway.”

Levi rolls his eyes, fairly used to Eren’s stubbornness by now. He stands still as Eren wipes at his face gently, getting rid of most of the blood. He clicks his tongue. “Don’t remind me.” Then, unable to help himself, he asks in an equally quiet voice, “Why do you care so much? I didn’t do this for you back then, and I doubt I deserve it.”

Lips curving into a small smile in response to those words, Eren looks from the area he is wiping clean to Levi’s eyes. “Like I said… we are even now, Levi,” he says almost matter-of-factly and pulls his hand away once he judges that Levi’s face is clean, his fingers brushing the edge of Levi’s upper lip as he does so.

Levi exhales heavily, almost as if a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders. “Right,” he says. “Even.” He still isn’t quite sure how he had managed to do it - get back on Eren’s good side, that is. Levi was sure he would have fucked it up somehow, even if it was just by a misinterpretation of his own words.

But Eren’s smile, however small, is a good sign that he has managed to do _something_ , though. And the soft brush of his fingers on the edge of Levi’s lip… that can’t possibly be him over-thinking things, can it?

Regardless, it still makes Levi’s throat run dry. “Thanks. For, uh, cleaning up the blood.”

Eren gives him a small nod, his smile growing just a little. “Maybe you should get Hanji to fix your nose?” he suggests. “You don’t want to set it wrong, right?” He takes a deep breath, and then releases it heavily. “So, uh… I think I’m going to join my friends now,” Eren says at last.

Levi almost dreads speaking to Hanji just so she can set his nose properly, because he knows exactly how likely she is to question how he had gotten it out of place, but he nods anyway. “Of course,” he says. “I think they were looking for you earlier actually.”

And, as if he’s unable to help himself, Levi allows a small, hardly-there smile to form on his lips. He’s definitely feeling better about his relationship with Eren now - maybe even more than that.


End file.
